Toxic Company? Just Got A Divorce? Bad Relationship?
Grieve for that relationship. Let the tears fall, mourn your lost and moments gone. There’s nothing wrong with doing so. I always believe that crying is strength in humility. Never look back and don’t regret anything. Let’s look forward in rebuilding our lives and making it brighter and fulfilling. Never let a break up or break down, break you. Thank them for their memories if it wasn’t a toxic relationship and try to move on with serenity. Focus on you for there won’t be anyone that would be there for you, like yourself. You are accountable to yourself. Life is a roller coaster. A battle of ups and downs. There are three ways we humans are designed to survive. Let me introduce you to: MAD -Move, Adapt or Die
There would come a point of time in life where you are faced with the inevitable option of moving on / moving away and we got to brace ourselves. Do not go back, do not succumb to the emotional yearning due to the attachments you have acquired in that relationship. There was a reason you left, forgive but don’t forget. Remember, we are accountable to ourselves. We ought to take care of ourselves. We cannot love others without first loving yourself. Adapt is one option of surviving but there must be a reason for you to let go, or you have no choice but to leave the relationship, then adapting is out of the picture for you . Death is what we want to avoid at all cost. I am talking about giving up on yourself and just killing your potential by refusing to let go properly and focusing on yourself.
Learn to love yourself, every aspect of you. Your brilliant smile, your radiant disposition, your opinions, your moral compass and yes even the little mole on your cheek. Never let yourself go as you let the relationship go. Work on yourself, acquire a new hobby, chase your passions, create a blog and vent it out, volunteer. Make these all part of your lifestyle, a lifestyle that reflects who you truly are; not trying to be something that you are not or to show off to whoever that you are doing better than them. Do this for you and you alone.
Remember, you are one of a kind.
I have decided to chase my passions and work on myself. These last few weeks have given me ample time to self-reflect and focus on what are my goals in life. Never let anyone pull you down nor discourage you. There will always be negative people around. Even the air, that we breath isn’t free from dusts, so ignore them ; cast them aside. You owe them no explanation. Be real, be you.
These are some steps to get you on road to healing that I have personally tried and these are my personal explanations for why I recommend them:
Talk to someone, confide it to someone who you trust and can provide you strong support.
Eat well and exercise. Taking care of your overall well-being promotes mental health and happiness.
Write down your thoughts and feelings in a diary for self reflection and track your moods and feelings. Being in tune with yourself makes you more conscious of your self and the reasons why you feel that way. Moreover, you will find out what truly makes you happy and those that makes you feel negative, you can omit it out of your life.
Take good long showers and treat yourself to a home spa. Get your favorite fragrances and soaps. Light aromatic candles in your bathroom. Play some soothing music as you submerge yourself into some soapy goodness. Scrub yourself clean and you will feel cleaner inwardly as well.
Try meditation. Breath in and out , deeply. Relax, and free your mind. Think of a happy place and imagine yourself there. Focusing your mind can be quite challenging at first but do not be disheartened. For some who struggle to focus on deep breathing with an empty mind or imagination is quite limited; try focusing your gaze on a candle and repeat positive affirmations.
Wake up each morning with a plan in your head about what you want to accomplish that day. Make a list , use google calendar, anything really… just plan your day and have it in your head when you wake up so that as you go about ticking them off your checklist in your head , you will feel really good about yourself.
Smile. Really, it does wonders.
“The most beautiful people I’ve known are those who have known trials, have known struggles, have known loss, and have found their way out of the depths.” – Elisabeth Kübler-Ross